Dear Potential Surrogate,

Thank you for considering joining us on this journey. We are so appreciative of your selflessness, kindness, and graciousness to consider doing this for another family.

A little bit about us –

M and I met on a dating app in 2017, a month after I had moved to Atlanta to go back to school. Ml had been living here since 2009, when he moved from Virginia to attend Georgia Tech. We got married in 2020, a small Covid wedding. Originally, we had planned a large gathering with all our friends and family but things changed, and it was actually the best decision ever. We picked a spot on the side of a “mountain” (it’s Georgia, so more like a big hill) and had our ceremony with immediate family and close friends. We had an even smaller reception afterwards at a brewery.

We have two family pets. Lucy, the cat, was a package-deal when I met M. I adopted her from the shelter in 2009. She has always been a grumpy old lady, but really she is a huge cuddle bug. Mick, the dog, we adopted together in 2019. M is Mick’s favorite parent. He loves his “dude’s days” when M works from home, but he loves to snuggle me in the evenings. 

In the last few years, I have become an avid reader for the first time in my life. I love a good mystery / thriller, modern fantasy, and some romance. I also have a collection of 20-something plants that I am frequently re-potting, propagating, and messing around with. M enjoys video games, especially role playing games. He also grew up playing ice hockey, and still plays for a local team, and enjoys golf. Together, we enjoy movies, the arcade, hiking, and all things animals.

We are very fortunate to have a great support system around us in Georgia. My mom, stepdad, M’s parents, my step brother and his family, my step sister and her family, all live within an hour of us. My dad, stepmom, and half-sister live in Idaho. M’s brother and his long-term girlfriend live in California. We also have a close group of friends, whom M played hockey with in college, and their “hockey wives.” 

In March 2022, we decided it was the right time to grow our family. I was so fortunate to get pregnant very quickly, only two months later, but I had an early miscarriage around 6 weeks. We healed, emotionally and physically, and I was pregnant again in November, but it was a chemical pregnancy. We sought out reproductive endocrinology specialists to figure out why this kept happening, and planned to just keep trying. I was pregnant again in July 2023, with the same result, another early miscarriage around 8 weeks. With no answers, we did every blood test, diagnostic test we were offered, all which came back normal. Finally, during a hysteroscopy, it was found that my uterus was covered in scar tissue, of unknown origin. My first hysteroscopy removed 75% of the scar tissue, but I required a second surgery to remove the rest.

During that second hysteroscopy, the doctors informed us of an unfortunate complication, a suspected uterine perforation. We were told this shouldn’t affect my ability to get pregnant. And it didn’t. I was pregnant two months later. M and I literally thought this was our miracle. For 22 weeks, our baby grew inside me. We got to see ultrasounds, I felt him kick and move, and we named him, B. But at 22 weeks and 2 days, we suffered a horrible complication that we never expected. My uterus had spontaneously ruptured in multiple places. I was rushed into the operating room for an emergency c-section to save my life. Bennett was too early and too small, and he died shortly after delivery.

The loss of B is the worst thing we’ve ever had to experience. Through therapy, and with each other, we have learned to live alongside our loss. I had a custom ring made by a lovely woman in California, which carries some of his ashes along with our birthstones. As life would have it, B passed on my 33rd birthday.

We had hoped to heal and be able to try again, but my new obgyn and fertility doctors have discussed that I am too high risk to carry another pregnancy. I would likely have the same outcome, a devastating child loss, and possibly lose my own life.

We are looking to be involved in this journey, and develop an organic relationship. We hope to attend the big appointments; transfer, anatomy scan, and delivery. We also hope to FaceTime during other appointments, if possible. We plan to tell our child how they were brought into this world, and the relationship between our two families.

M and I never imagined being here. Asking another woman to carry our embryo, to grow our baby, and deliver our baby safely into this world. But, we can tell you that we are so thankful for you, and we hope you choose to take this journey with us.

With love,

A and M 

A + M Intended Parents Ready to Match