Dear Prospective Surrogate,
Thank you so much for taking the time to read this letter and to learn a little bit more about us. Before we share anything about our journey, we need to extend our most heartfelt gratitude for your interest in wanting to help families like ours grow. We could never fully express how much what you are doing means to us. We are so thankful for your willingness to help make people’s dreams of having a child come true. It is the biggest gift that we can imagine, and we are so in awe of your kindness.
Our names are Mary and Pearse. We live in Nashville, Tennessee in a 100-year-old house with a big garden. We have two sweet fluffy pups named Oliver and Idgie and 4 silly, friendly hens. Mary is originally from Seattle and also grew up in Illinois. As a child, she loved helping her brother learn to read, and this inspired her to become a first-grade teacher for many years. She now works as a dyslexia therapist. Mary enjoys gardening, hiking, crocheting, reading, and fixing up their old house. Pearse grew up in Austin, Texas, and taught middle school math. He now works for the local school district as a data analyst. He enjoys playing instruments (tuba and trombone), spending time with his friends, listening to music, and cooking. Together, we love to try out new recipes, pamper our sweet pets, play board games, and watch TV shows (especially mysteries and cozy shows like Bake Off).
We met four years ago on a coffee date, where we talked until the coffee shop closed down. We were immediately surprised by all that we had in common. We both worked in education, both had close relatives who lived in Ireland, both had parents who were born in other countries (Ireland and Poland), and our siblings had a lot in common too. Pearse was drawn to Mary’s sweetness and Mary loved that Pearse has the kindest heart. We spent the next couple of years laughing, reading, going on walks, learning new things, and cooking together. We were engaged in Glacier National Park at sunrise and got married in the mountains of North Carolina in 2022 surrounded by our loving family and friends.
When we were planning our wedding, we received news from our doctors that led us to pursue surrogacy. When Mary was 4 years old, she became very sick with a rare disease and was not expected to survive. Luckily, she pulled through and is now healthy. Given her medical history and our desire to start a family, our doctors decided to run some labs and discovered that the condition would have a high chance of recurring if Mary got pregnant. They told us that there was a 50% chance the disease would cause Mary to die or to have end-stage renal failure, that it would need to be treated with life-long chemotherapy, and that the baby may not survive either.
It was so scary and devastating to think about the complications that Mary’s condition could cause. We cried as we pictured our dreams of a family slipping away from us. It broke our hearts as we stared at the picture books Mary collected as a teacher and didn’t know if we would ever read them to our own child. We tried to hide our sadness at work as young students would ask us why we didn’t have kids of our own. The doctors’ news seemed to make our dreams so far away.
As we sorted through this medical information, we spoke with high-risk pregnancy doctors who told us that we should consider surrogacy. When they shared this option with us, we immediately felt so relieved and thankful that surrogacy could allow us to have a child one day. More than anything, we dream of having a family of our own and creating a loving home for our children. We love to daydream about names and what our child’s interests might be. Whenever we prepare for a holiday or cook a new recipe, we talk about what it might be like when we get to share these traditions and meals with a sweet baby. The thought that a surrogate could help us bring this baby into the world is such a special, unique, and beautiful connection that we are so thankful for.
We would love to support our responsible surrogate throughout this process. Throughout our journey together, we would love to make sure you feel supported and trusted. We would also like to grow a relationship that feels natural. It would mean a lot to us to be able to attend important appointments virtually or in person, to hear how you and the baby are doing, and to record our voices for the baby to hear. If you were interested, we would love to keep in touch with you to share our future child’s milestones as they grew. Throughout the process, we want to make it clear how grateful we are and how we so appreciate you.
Thank you so much for reading about our family and our journey! It means so much to us.
Mary and Pearse